I have mentioned before that I have started a new job and with that I have decided to let other people in. I have told my boss and my coworker about Jackson. Not to much information just that I have a son but he has died. I guess I wasn't sure what kind of reception I would get and I know that it catches others off guard. I guess I wouldn't know what to say when someone would tell me the same before.
The end is getting near, its now February and unfortunately its the shortest month of the year. Not that it will change anything when I get to the 28th, it won't bring Jackson back and I will probably just relive that day with Tim and wonder where things went wrong. How I miss him. What I would give for just one more day to hold him in my arms and feel like everything would be ok. This is what I really want to tell people.
You should tell people that you do have a son and that he looks out for you from Heaven. You should let people know how sweet he smelled, and that when you touched him your heart melted. You should tell them how red his hair was and that it stood in a Mohawk on it own. People should know just to see him brought a smile to everyone’s face. You should tell people how it felt to hold him in your arms and rock him to sleep and how proud you feel to be Jackson’s Mommy! You should tell people how 4 short months with Jackson made you feel alive, needed, and loved so deeply. I know his angelversary will be a difficult day but we should try and remember what was great in the 4 months he was with us!! That’s what I will try and do! Love you!!
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