November 2nd 2009 - February 28th 2010

“No day will ever erase you from the memory of time”

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Happy Birthday Jackson

I wish I could say that I remember all the magical things that led up to your arrival but sadly I only have the notes that Grandma has. After the cervadil didn't work the broke my water and put me on the drip. I never realized how much pain I would be in.

I remember you giving us a scared when they couldn't find your heartbeat. I had 6 nurses within 10 seconds at my bedside. They found it and brought in the doctor just to make sure everything was ok. I got them to call my midwife because I needed something to ease the pain.

For 8 hours I laboured trying anything but the epidural. Until the doctor decided that I needed to have it for the labour to progress. The epidural didn't work and I never did dialate. The doctor told me that I needed to have a c-section. I can remember being so upset because that was not how I wanted to have you. Later I found out they were worried about your heartrate dropping all the time.

When I finally got to see you I was so happy. You were safe and sound in daddy's arms. He was so proud to be your daddy. I saw how happy he was. I finally got to hold you in the recovery room. I couldn't stop shaking but I stopped long enough to hold you and kiss you. Grandma Sue kept saying that your eyes looked purple. I kept thinking I can't believe your mine.

You changed our lives forever. Today will always be a special day because you came into this world. Happy Birthday love you always and forever Mommy and Daddy


  1. Thank you Tim and Lindsay for letting me be a part of that wonderful adventure that led to such a beautiful event. Love to both of you. Miss you sweet little Jackson. xoxo

  2. Today I wish for so many things. I wish that we could all go back to this day one year ago, but know what we know now. I wish you could have protected him at any cost from what was meant to be. I wish we could see him, hug him, kiss him again, just one more time. I wish I could stroke his hair, look into his beautiful eyes and tell him how much we love him and that we can't live without him. Sadly I know in my heart these wishes can not come true. So instead I will wish you and Tim continued and forever love. I will wish you and Tim strength for today and all the hard days ahead. I will wish that in any small way possible you and Tim find some small amount of peace. I wish you both to know you were the most loving and caring and wonderful parents. Lastly I will wish that you and Tim know how much we all love and miss Jackson, how we all love and care for both of you, and that no matter what we will always be here.

  3. Gramma Debbie said......One year ago today, at 7:11am you came into this world and straight into my heart where you will stay forever and always. Love you Jackson, kisses and hugs today and everyday xoxo
    Love you Tim and Lindsay...Mom/Gramma

  4. Lindsay, I wish things were different. Thinking of you and Jackson.